Kevin Magnussen has revealed he battled depression early in his F1 career after brutally missing out on a seat with McLaren in 2015.
Having made his debut for the Woking-based squad in 2014, securing a second-place finish on the first time of asking at the Australian Grand Prix - becoming the first rookie to score a podium on debut since Jacques Villeneuve in 1996 - the now-32-year-old had to endure a season on the sidelines the following year.
Although, that was not then-CEO Ron Dennis' plan. According to Magnussen, the majority of the McLaren board wanted him to partner Fernando Alonso in 2015, not Jenson Button.
Despite the British driver outperforming his rookie team-mate across the campaign, not a huge surprise given the significant disparity in experience at the time, seven of the nine board members were in favour of the Dane taking the seat, including Dennis, in an substantial majority.
Magnussen had scored points in 12 of the 19 rounds that year, finishing three places behind Button in the standings, albeit it on 55 to the 2009 F1 drivers' champion's 126.
However, the two objectors were Mansour Ojjeh and Shaikh Mohammed Bin Essa Al Khalifa, the team's majority shareholders. They overruled the vote and Magnussen was consigned to his fate.
"I became depressed in 2015," he told Motor Sport Magazine. "I don't mind admitting that. I lived to race, and I wasn't racing.
"Together, Mohammed and Mansour had a majority shareholding, so they used that power to overrule everyone else, including Ron, who'd voted for me, and in 2015 I ended up being the reserve driver, which meant nothing really.
"But Ron said: 'Trust me, you'll race for us in 2016, or maybe even before the end of the 2015 season.' And, honestly, I think he was being sincere. That really was his plan for me."
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When Alonso was injured in a pre-season testing accident, Magnussen was back in the car for the 2015 curtain raiser in Australia.
But, cruelly for the now-veteran of 185 grand prix starts, the new Honda power unit in the back of his McLaren failed on the way to the Melbourne grid.
The team failed to fulfil the assurances made to him, and the Danish driver was released from McLaren at the end of the season.
He ended up racing for Renault in 2016, but not before he had passed up an opportunity with Williams on account of further promises, this time from Éric Boullier.
"So, when Williams contacted my then manager Dorte [Riis Madsen] about me racing for them in 2016," Magnussen added, "I talked to Éric [Boullier, racing director] about it, and he said: 'No, stay with us, you'll race for us with Fernando next season.'
"And, honestly, I think he was being sincere, too. So, reassured by both Ron and Éric, I didn't pursue the Williams option."
The former Haas driver also had the chance to race in Japan during his year waiting in the wings at McLaren, but did not pursue it on the advice of Dennis, who appeared to change his stance for the team's next reverse driver, Stoffel Vandoorne.
"I had an offer to do some Super Formula races in Japan, which would have been cool, but Ron said I shouldn't," Magnussen said.
"In 2016, when Stoffel was the McLaren reserve driver, Ron let him race in Super Formula, and he loved it, winning a couple of races, so I don’t know why Ron didn't allow me to do the same thing the year before, but anyway he didn't."
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